Gen Z Burnout Epidemic: Why Young Minds are Burning Out Before 25?
As a psychologist, I’m observing a worrying trend: Young minds are fixated on: “How can I change their opinion?” “How can I make them behave differently?” “How do I make them like me?” “Am I valued?” “Am I good enough?”. This is definitely a shift from what I observed 15 years ago when I first stepped into a mental health clinic. This is being driven by an ongoing, never-ending, futile, fight for external validation, control and perfection.
The desire to manage how every single person views them is destined for burnout. It is an exhausting pursuit for a perfect self-image and a perfectly controlled environment. They are just not able to wrap their head around the idea that they are not responsible for other people’s minds or actions. In this circle of thought, they lose their sense of their own selves.
This translates into self-sabotaging ruminating thoughts, OCD tendencies, and crippling anxiety symptoms, all centred around their perceived image—how they are seen, perceived, and thought about by others. This leads to the “not able to achieve my potential” thought, the potential that everyone put into the individual’s head from childhood. Unfortunately, all this is happening at a very subconscious level which they are able to mask really well until a full burnout.
While many parents today are doing everything humanly possible to support their children, I observe a paradox in the homes of these struggling young adults. These are kind, devoted parents whose focus remains on optimizing their child’s successful trajectory though unlike the previous generations, it is not on the performance output and measurable achievements. Then why is this happening to all these young, smart, multi-talented individuals?
I observe that in their desire to shield their children from hardship, these parents often create an environment of controlled freedom and managed failure. While well-intentioned, this prevents the child from developing the internal locus of control necessary to navigate adult life. The child becomes the centre of the family. The child believes they are truly special, which is good but anything good which is not in moderation, becomes toxic. The space for true independence, for stumbling and recovering authentically, is diminished.
The result is a generation whose entire self-worth is intertwined with external approval, often beginning with the most important external audience: the family. Their internal compass is constantly pointed outward, leading to a singular, immense goal: to make their family proud.
When this making my family (or family member) proud-driven identity meets the volatile, uncontrollable world of competition, peer opinions and social media, where they realise there are many others who are all just like them, the outcome is devastating. They are failing miserably not because they lack talent, but because the foundation of their worth was built on the shaky ground of approval and image, rather than on the solid bedrock of unbreakable self-image, self-direction and resilience. They haven’t been allowed the essential practice of failing privately and learning independently.
True growth and peace come not from achieving unattainable external perfection, but from turning inward. Children need to learn to focus on what they can control: your own values, efforts, and self-compassion. Most important of all, they need to have a self-acceptance even when there is someone else who might be better at something and know that does not mean they are not special anymore. You are already valuable, you don’t need to earn it.
For psychological support, please write to contact@ubhcare.com or call us at +919840041737/ WhatsApp at +919047452258.
You can book your appointment with Dr. Porrselvi A.P., PhD, Clinical Lead Psychologist, Unified Brain Health Care on https://calendar.app.google/7couq1SF8CpFarrM9
